Transformation

I live a charmed life.

I left the United States two years ago and moved to Guadalajara, Mexico.

I live in a luxury high-rise apartment with a stunning view, I'm in a great relationship, I hit the gym six days a week, eat healthy foods, and help executive brothers step into their greatness as my profession.

I’m blessed.

However, this wasn’t always my life.

In fact, this is all new for me.

I’m forty.

Midlife.

When I was twenty-five, I was financially broke, emotionally all over the place, distant from my family, and spiritually disconnected.

From twenty to thirty, I lived in a continuous state of operating below my full professional potential.

I knew I had greatness in me, but I couldn’t find a way to unlock it.

I also talked a big game about the things I was going to do, but I didn’t have the results to show for it in my actual life.

The reason I thought I hadn’t reached my full potential was because I was misunderstood, my boss was racist, there was a gender war in society, my parents weren’t wildly successful and never showed me the way, the world was broken, and anything else I could point to outside of myself.

There was nothing wrong with me.

I was good.

The world needed fixing.

Not me.

Others needed correcting.

Not me.

I was Mr. prom King.

Jewel Love, from Encinal High School.

A boss.

However, my life was a flat-out embarrassment.

You remember that 50-Cent video, where he said, “Damn homie, in high school you was the man homie, what the f*** happened to you?”

Well, what happened was that I was still living in my past greatness, not realizing that I had to let that identity go to step into my next best self.

I’m not proud of that time in my life, but it’s the truth.

I knew I had greatness in me and a unique and powerful mission in life however, I just couldn’t figure out how to tap into it.

However, after five years of continuous suffering, and hitting rock bottom, I finally caved and surrendered.

For the first time in my life, I stopped pretending that I was the man, that I was a “boss”, got real with myself, and acknowledged that I didn’t know what was going on, and that I was lost.

I remember the day viscerally when I surrendered my ego, dropped to my knees in desperation and begged God, the universe, my ancestors, Spirit, or whoever was out there for help.

I was tired of reading inspirational books, watching motivational speakers on YouTube, going to one-off workshops, and attending local networking sessions.

I was finally ready for a real transformation in my life and for a coach or mentor figure to lead the way.

And Spirit answered…

Just like magic, my life changed.

By acknowledging that I didn’t have the answers, and that I didn’t know how to tap into my greatness, the doors to everything I wanted in life opened up for me.

Soon after I surrendered my ego, I met my first mentor, who changed my life.

We worked together for two years, and he took me on a journey that took my center of self away from my childhood and teenage identities into my manhood identity.

The change was absolutely incredible.

My relationships improved, genuine self-esteem emerged, my career took off, and I was even dressing better.

From then on, I’ve had therapist after therapist, mentor after mentor, coach after coach, who have helped me continuously transform into my greatest self.

The commitment to step into your greatest self, to be that thought leader, the elite man, that executive officer, that board member, flying on jets and hobnobbing with influential people at Morton’s Steakhouse, and being paid to keynote that conference.

That father. That husband. That brother. That community leader.

The commitment to step into becoming that man is risky.

You risk giving up your old self for something new.

However, I want to tell you, as somebody who has taken that step and can likely show you how as well, that the is not coming from the great part of you, it’s coming from the mediocre part of you that is afraid you will leave it behind.

For the brothers in corporate America, I get it.

You are tasked with holding it all together, guiding your family, and competing in a very White and sometimes Asian world where you are constantly the minority and have to keep it all together at all times.

There is a real fear that if you admit that you don’t know, that you might be doing something wrong, that your way isn’t working, that it might be you, then your whole world may fall apart and you could lose your job, family, home, and possibly even your sanity.

The deep fear that you might unravel through a coaching relationship or that your coach would take advantage of you in any way is the same thinking that keeps most brothers at their current level of seniority and far from the mental peace and success that are waiting for them.

I am not a pastor, a priest, a shaman, a spiritual guide, a guru, or anything like that, but when you go into a coaching relationship with me, you must ask yourself before hand, are you ready to say goodbye to the mediocre part of yourself, even if you are earning $200,000 or $500,000, and welcome in a level of greatness in yourself that you’ve never experienced before.

We’re gonna go deep.

If that makes you fearful, I understand.

I had the exact same fear myself.

However, when I finally faced that fear head-on and surrendered to the fact that my way wasn’t working, is when the universe sent me the exact guide I needed to highlight and hold me accountable to taking my next steps toward the amazing life I have today.

On the other side of that door are all the treasures you’ve been dreaming of.

If you’re reading this newsletter, then the doorway to your greatest self is right in front of you.

Be brave, and walk through.